L.A Noire Sucks

L.A Noire is Rockstar's latest game coming in just a few more weeks on Xbox 360 and PS3 much to the delight of gamers the world over. But there's something strangely odd and compelling about Team Bondi's efforts which we're going to look at in a bit of detail here. We're going to categorically state that L.A. Noire truly sucks... but perhaps not in the way you're thinking.

We got some hands on time with the game this week for the first time, in the comfort of Rockstar's London Studios and although we had a number of preconceived ideas already rolling about our minds, the session provided us some interesting feelings that we've not really encountered before in a video game. Sure, games like Heavy Rain have pushed the levels of interaction in new and fresh directions , and the point and click CSI games have really tested the grey matter, but L.A. Noire does something entirely different and really, it does suck.

Before the knives are embedded into our backs, and our own murders become the scenes of gruesome investigations, let's explain shall we.

L.A. Noire sucks, it's like a 1940s hoover without the noise and the perpetual back ache from rocking back and forward on dusty carpets and mite ridden cloths. Just a mere few minutes of playing the demo level we started to like Cole Phelps (the game's lead character), his animations, the no nonsense talking and the interactions with those around him. He's likeable because of what he stands for, and although we cared not of his war veteran past, we were very much interested in how he was going to tackle the next hour of gameplay.

The scene of the crime in the demo was horrific, although perhaps not as visually over the top as you might have seen in other games which offer a more comical slant on death and destruction. The sombre music, the background sounds of the city, the frowning faces of your colleagues, the sighs of disgust reaching out around the closed building walls, who had witnessed what had happened, and if only could speak. It's interesting that a simple scene, a dead body, cut up, discarded like it was nothing, a life of an innocent wasted could facilitate such emotion so soon. Why would anyone do this, surely murder is murder - you kill and be done with it - but what sick bastard plays with the carcass once life has departed from it? Who carves writing into the flesh, leaves messages for the investigators, toys with the emotions, and says, "come on then, catch me if you can".

Instantly L.A. Noire sucks you in to this underlying mindset that you're very much the investigator, you're there not to tear around the 40s streets in authentic looking vehicles, hanging out the window shooting up gangsters. No. You've got a job to do and with that in mind, you become the detective. It's not a first person game, and so you're very much looking at another individual, but as the game sucks you in further, you're left begging to see how events unfold, and the beauty is, it's in your hands, under your control.

There's a real slow pace to the game which goes against what you might be expecting, but in the most suitable way is the embodiment of what investigations are all about, especially as the killer isn't caught red handed and you're left looking at the pieces to try and make sense of it. What really adds to the tension and the robust nature of the game's mechanics is the fact that there are no fancy tools at your disposal, no CCTV footage to ponder, no UV lights to spot blood, no computer databases to search through; and it's this visceral level of crime fighting that ultimately is the game's biggest asset. It's because of this raw nature that L.A Noire sucks you in. You're looking at stuff with the eyes of a detective, more so than any other game, you start evaluating the evidence, thinking more about what you've seen, making sense of what it means, what clues it gives.

L.A. Noire sucks in the gamer, in a way that is refreshing, to the extent where the mystery of the blanks become a distinct requirement destined to be filled in. It's a game which sucks to the point where, you won't be content taking a break and waiting, you'll want to see it through, you'll stop at nothing until there's some resolution. The game builds up the drama, the tension, the hatred for the criminal, sucks you in, then eschews time itself and leaves you at the precipice of finality. There's a number of games that offer a "one last go" factor, but L.A. Noire provides similar motives, but in a unique way that can only be described as a gripping hand pulling you into its world, placing you into a chair, tightening the knots around bounding ropes, and clasping both hands around your neck for a murderous kill, yet at the same time keeping you well alive to fathom and escape the clever puzzles it presents to you. L.A Noire truly does suck, but for all the right reasons. Perhaps take some time off work come May 20th, because that chair is not going to be easy to escape from.